suicide on a happy day

by tasha ann
(usa)

broken
always waiting to be healed
afraid to be together with someone forever
confused
whole body bleeding
inside and outside
hiding the pain in the heart
which withers and dies
blackness engulfing my mind
my thoughts of suicidal ways
waiting til someone drives me over
the edge into that black abyss
those drowning waters
suffocating me
i cant breathe
save me so i can change
but no you
just leave me here to die
why are you so mean
why don't you care
like you said you did
i thought you were going to catch me if i fell
well i fell
and now im a haunting spirit
neither dead nor free
goodbye
maybe ill come to your room in the night
haunt you make you do what i did
make you feel worse than if you were in hell
burning in the fire life
then dying with no friends
look at me now
what do you see
death in my eyes
and my wrists all ableed
what happened?