Friends getting in the way of romantic relationship...

by james
(england)

im seeing this girl now for 6 months now and we really get on well, we cant believe how things are after happening so quick but we didnt try slow them down because everything feels right. but latey we are having a few little arguments. when we are toghter everything couldnt be better we get on so well but its when we're apart things get a bit bad.

i live with a few housemates who tend to play the field which results in girls being over but when she hears this she can tend to say something smart, i can understand where she is coming from but i promised i would never cheat on her, trust me i wouldnt!!

im crazy about her, she is the first person where everything feels right, apart from our few little things! :)

i understand that she just might be jealous that there are girls around but shouldn't she just trust me? she usually stays over a couple of nights a week but for me sometimes i would like to see her more but she has a few friends lately that want a lot from her.

every night there is someone asking her to meet up and i am an understandable guy and i dont mind because i know how important friends are but i feel like she is trying to please everyone and our relationship is lacking because of it. Am i being unfair and thinking of myself when i say i want to see more of her?

Tonight she is calling over to a friend that she had an argument with due to the fact that they never get to see each other enough and I'm meeting her after it and we are gonna have a quiet night in and spend some quality time together.

i know its going to be great but i dread when we're apart.. are all these things going to finish us or can it work out like i hope it can, we talk about the future and us in years to come and it feels and sounds right..

does anyone else see some hope??





Answer

There is definitely hope.

It seems like most of your arguments stem from not being around one another, which is a good thing. That means you like each other.

That said, you both need to chill out a little.

She has no reason to get mad at you for the lifestyle choices of your friends. She's got to learn to trust you. Thats an important part of a successful relationship.

Also though, you need to let her have her friends. It's not fair to hog someone to yourself like that. It's important to reach a balance in life between friends, your romantic relationship, work, etc.

My guess is that you guys will be fine. You're just experiencing some (love) growing pains. It'll take time to get to the right balance that will satisfy everyone.

In the meantime, make the most of the time you're together, and each of you work on chilling out when you're apart.

Good Luck.